With Us, It's Personal
I'm a pretty tough broad. I played ice hockey. I've been in bar fights (and won). But, this past week, I met my match. I was completely laid out and put to shame by. . . the flu. Did you know this is supposedly the worst flu season in recent memory? Let me tell you — there's nothing sexy about body aches, runny eyes and a hacking cough. Gross.
By Sunday, I was out of everything, from tissues to Tylenol. So I got dressed for the first time in five days and ventured out to my local Rite Aid Pharmacy. I was anticipating a ho-hum trip to the store, but that's not what I got. As I rounded the corner from beauty aids, headed to the medicine aisle, I saw it — the personal care section. And what was front and center, at eye-level, on the shelf? A vibrator. A fucking VIBRATOR. At RITE AID.
There it was, the Durex Little Gem "personal massager" for $39.99. And lest anyone confuse it with a back or neck massager, this vibe with "flutter action" was positioned smack between Rite Aid's own brand of "warming" lubricant and the biggest condom selection I've seen anywhere. Nope — no mistaking. Rite Aid is in the adult toy business.
I have to say, I'm impressed. It's tough to find the brands you like and products you need in Vermont, but now I know that I can get Astroglide, female condoms and a new vibrator right up the road. And, hey, talk about convenience — I can also get Monistat and Summer's Eve in the same aisle (sad, but true — sometimes extended sexual interludes can leave us a little worse for wear).
And had I not felt like the walking dead, I may have been motivated to buy that Little Gem and review it for y'all. But, alas, I'm still gross with flu. Maybe next time.
That's nothing. I was in CVS in Boston the other day and saw a vibrator called "The Healthometer."
Yep.
Posted by: Some Guy | Sunday, February 24, 2008 at 07:19 PM
Huh. I'll have to Google that one.
Posted by: MistressMaeve | Monday, February 25, 2008 at 01:51 PM
http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=6486432
That one.
Posted by: Some Guy | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 08:06 AM
Haha. I love the Healthometer massagers are designed to, "keep your muscles toned." I still say that Rite Aid is a bit more shameless when it comes to the marketing. I noticed that on their website (powered by drugstore.com), you're just one click away from an entire line of dildos and vibes. (Of course, when you click there, the Rite Aid logo disappears.)
Posted by: MistressMaeve | Tuesday, February 26, 2008 at 11:17 AM