Non-scents

I recently became greatly disturbed to learn that two of my male friends from college have begun wearing female body spray in an earnest attempt to attract women. No, I'm not joking. And these are actually really smart dudes -- not to mention beastly hairy and fairly masculine all around.

They have deduced that because women purchase these pungent perfumes, soaps and sprays, they (women) must be attracted to the scents  -- and therefore will be attracted to any man who wears "cucumber melon" or "apple orchard."

Here's a news flash: Straight women like sweat. No, not the oxidized sweat smell that emanates from your gym bag -- but the fresh, clean sweat that bursts from your pores, full of pheromones. That's why they make cologne -- most male scents are made with musk, reminiscent of body odors.

To my friends, I say: Drop with the "strawberry fields" and go au naturel.

To my readers, I ask: What scents drive you wild?

Comments

[Boyflux]

The scents I wear make me feel good about me: subtle, spicy, woody, sweet and savory. That sounds like chicken tikka, but...mmm...now I'm hungry. There's also something about the scent of tobacco (not cigarettes), cloves (the cigs), and chocolate that makes me feel warm inside.

The scents I like on women are natural, fresh, clean and not overbearing. I don't want a girl to smell like bleach, but cool natural scents are nice. I like warm scents too, but not musky...they're too obvious. Oh...and no patchouli! I'm not sure why some women insist on smelling like an overripe orchard, though. Even the scents that should be subtle (like say, cucumber melon) are sickly sweet. Whenever I smell Angel anywhere in my vicinity it brings me back to me teen years.

It sounds like I know what I don't like more than what I do, but that feels like half the battle sometimes.

Tell your friends, from a guy (who's likely around their age), that showering, wearing simple deodorant and smelling fresh is still #1. It may not get you all of the ladies, but it's like giving a house that you're trying to sell a fresh coat of neutral paint. Painting your body with the equivalent of neon pink and lime green will only attract a certain type of buyer, and the rest will walk away without a second thought.

[MistressMaeve]

I couldn't agree more. Shower and apply deodorant -- that's all you need, boys. Also, avoid strong-smelling shampoos, especially if you have long locks. Again, neutral is best in my book.

As for me, I know it isn't for everybody, but I love wearing something with a vanilla base or honey base. Right now, I'm bent on Honey & Lemon Eau de Toilette from L'Occitane, but Amber Romance by Victoria's Secret is my old standby (terrible name, wonderful smell).

On dudes, I like nothing by musky deodorant... or perhaps the smell of sex, leather and/or motor oil.

;)

[Big Al]

And what guy DOESN'T have a quart or two of 10W-30 in the trunk?

[MistressMaeve]

Seriously.

[Boyflux]

My car takes 5W-20 - Maybe that's why I can't get the ladies to give me the time of day!

[MistressMaeve]

Ha. Yeah, I guess Mother Nature would probably frown upon my love for motor oil and all things leather. Not very "Vermont" of me, either...

[Vinny]

No particular scent drives me wild (besides BBQ), but scent is the strongest sense tied to memory and can make a good/bad permanent impression. I worked into work today by this woman and she was wearing the exact same perfume as my first girlfriend. Eerie how easy it was to remember that.

[Wild in Winooski]

For me, a straight 31 y/o woman, I love the smell of his sweat (post coital, yum) and deodorant. Nothing sexier or hotter than that. Agreeing with a earlier post, Shower and apply deodorant -- that's all you need, boys. A turn off, tho, is cigar & cigarette smoke. Along with that soaked in booze smell. When you come in from mowing the lawn, covered in sweat & grass clippings....YUMYUM! I like to wear light fresh scents in the summer, currently Lilac w/ vanilla undertones & something deeper, more exotic in the wintertime.

[NEK Lady]

I'm a young woman, and I love the way my guy smells fresh out of the shower, right after he has shaved and but on aftershave. I hate the way his aftershave smells in the bottle, but on him it is YUMMY. A huge, huge turn-off for me, scent-wise, is the guys (usually college aged) who wear a can and a half of axe/tag/what-have-you every day. A little of the stuff is fine, but apparently guys feel the need to spray on enough to be smelled from northern Canada. It literally makes me want to hurl.

[brendan]

as one of the aforementioned dudes, i will state the following facts in my defense:

1) i've been using bath and body works product for years; this is no recent development.

2) nowhere in the universe is it written that bath and body works product is strictly for feminine use.

3) people will be hard pressed to believe it, but i don't wear bath and body works product to attract women. i could really care less about attracting women. i enjoy smelling nice, and i think that the scent of any given men's cologne is about the most disgusting thing in the world. therefore, since the attraction of the female species is a complete and total non-issue, i'd much rather smell like an apple orchard than a tire fire at the drakkar noir factory; please direct any and all lawsuits to my crack team of attorneys.

in conclusion, i will continue to smell like a cherry blossom, an apple orchard or something else vaguely fruit-like and pleasant, and you will do nothing to stop me.

that is all.
brendan

[MistressMaeve]

So, Brendan...

If you started dating a girl who was turned off by your strawberry fields forever, would you put up the Bath and Body Works? Or, are you really attached to your scents?

[brendan]

any girl who would want me to change something about myself as a condition of our dating is a girl who would probably be better served dating a douchebag smelling of polo sport.

that is all.
brendan

[Sp]

I happen to like those douchebags that smell of polo sport... just saying. And I have to agree that sweat is always #1 even if it is a little strange and cavewoman like. But in Brendan's defense I only met a man who had bath & body work airfreshners in his bedroom and I was...oddly...attracted at some level, maybe it was that it smelled good AND it was clean. There IS something to be said for that! ;)

[love stinks]

I have nearly no sense of smell. I shower. I don't wear deoderant. Nobody has ever complained. If a girl I'm with digs perfume...good for her but don't wear it on my account - I won't even notice the stuff.