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April 18, 2011

Gov. Shumdog by the Numbers

Governor.vermont Today, Gov. Shumlin's office released a roundup of all the things our esteemed leader has done since he took office in January. And you thought he was just working on his tan in Dominica for the last three and a half months. Nope! Dude's actually been doing stuff. And not just cutting ribbons, breaking ground, holding giant checks, signing proclamations, shaking hands, crafting, receiving honorary degrees, standing at podiums and fishing — all the things I want my governor to be good at.

According to the list below provided by press secretary Bianca Slota, Shumlin has also been hanging out in Québec, skiing, tweeting, taking photos of himself, checking his Facebook, making YouTube videos, shooting guns and, curiously, filling potholes. (Have our state finances gone so pear-shaped that our own governor is forced to scoop hot asphalt?)

So, don't think he hasn't been doing anything. Because he has. And he can prove it! 

Governor Shumlin's first 100 days: By the numbers

April 15, 2011 - MONTPELIER - Tomorrow marks Governor Shumlin's first 100 days in office. Between his inaugural and budget addresses, constant meetings with legislators and legislative leadership, and travels throughout the state, Governor Shumlin is constantly on the move. Here's a snapshot of the first 100 days, by the numbers:

Times testified before U.S. Congress: 1 ("Free maple syrup for everyone!")

Trips to Québec: 2 (What? He was craving some poutine.)

Meetings with President Obama: 3 (Shumdog wrecked the prez in a game of streetball. "That's how we do in Vermont, Barry!")

Potholes filled: 4 (Part of the governor's "Join a chain gang for a day" initiative.)

Ski areas visited: 5 (Sick pow, brah!)

Town meetings attended: 6 (Sore butt.)

Military events: 7 (You should see him twirl a flag!)

Hospitals visited: 8 (He's a regular Mother Theresa.)

Sportsmen events: 9 (Thankfully, none of these ended like Dick Cheney's little accident.)

Bills signed: 10 (Gosh, his hand must be tired.)

Schools visited: 16 (He was helping kids read good.)

Videos uploaded to VTGovernor YouTube Channel: 21 (Some are sort of NSFW, so be warned.)

Community and business leaders events: 24 (Snooze.)

Businesses visited: 27 (Boring.)

Proclamations issued: 38 ("I proclaim it Hot Caribbean Girls in Bikinis Day.") 

Towns visited: 50 (Only 201 to go!)

Legislative meetings: 76 (Real boring.)

Appointments to boards and commissions: 133 (Funny, I didn't get my appointment yet.)

Tweets: 246 (@VTGovernor- "Can't seem 2 shake statie bodyguard. How's a single guv supposed 2 have fun? LOL! #vt #montp #goldendome") 

Questions received through "Ask the Governor”: 397 (But, does he ever answer them?)

Likes on Facebook: 642 (That's 642 more than Jim Douglas got.)

Views on VTGovernor YouTube Channel: 951 (Not so popular.)

Followers on Twitter: 1128 (Popular!)

Pictures uploaded to Vermont Governor flickr page: 1470 (Someone's photogenic.)

Letters fielded: 1722 (Wait, what's a letter?)

Constituent emails fielded: 1806 (Interns!) visits: 34,825 (Getting his Internet on.)

Dollars raised for the VT National Guard families: 70,500 (Was this at the "Neck a Governor" kissing booth?)

Maple syrup mentions: Countless (You will never beat Maple Man, so don't even try.)

Ed. note — Obviously, the parentheticals were not part of the original press release.  


That wasn't helpful commentary at all. Snarky is fine, but like, be clever.

"Businesses visited: 27 (Boring.)" Why is this boring Lauren? It's time to get Vt's economy moving and growing. This governor is trying to do something about it. What would you rather him do, follow you around for a boring day like you are going to make Lite guv Scott endure? The people who have never really created a job are always first to point fingers and mock the ones who have.

The interesting stuff never gets a press release. How many runaway legislators were wrestled to the ground? How many bruised egos stroked in order to get the agenda back on track? How many asses were kicked (metaphorically of course)? These are the battles governors fight in complete obscurity.

What may have seemed hilarious while dining on free range Maple Syrup infused grits at Penny Cluse falls flat in the light of day.

It's Mother Teresa ... not that she would have minded the misspelling.

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