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Tuesday, May 29, 2007

May Day

If you didn't know, May is National Masturbation Month — so you should probably hurry up and get off as much as possible before Friday.

In honor of this illustrious month, I've decided to take a poll. On average, how many times per week do you masturbate? Personally, my number of self lovin' sessions depends upon my stress level and my social calendar — but whatever I don't do during the week, I generally more than make up for on the weekends. I have to admit that writing this blog has elevated my masturbatory status. I'm paid to have sex on my brain and my mind in the gutter at all times — masturbating is a natural, and much-needed, outlet.

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