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Monday, February 11, 2008


When was the last time you masturbated? Today? Last night? Last week? I know there must be exceptions, but I think most of you who read this blog are probably regular masturbators. I know I am.

I have to admit, though, my masturbatory routine has become somewhat mundane lately. Give me both my hands and about two minutes — and I'm done. (For the record, I can often get myself off in one minute if I'm under pressure. I've been known to secretly get myself off while my bedfellow takes a quick trip to bathroom — dastardly little devil, I am.)

But I digress.

Tonight I'm doing things differently. Before I sleep tonight, I will take out a few of my favorite toys, light candles, put on some Portishead and give myself along-overdue solo session. Whether you're masturbating because you're single, because you're in a new relationship and waiting to get it on, or just because you like it, there's no reason you shouldn't put in a little extra time to make it a more relaxing, pleasurable experience. Get inspired — read erotica, watch your favorite porno, think about that person who's been invading your fantasies lately.

Instead of that perfectly-timed 3-minute pop song, play yourself the extended remix...

Have fun.


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