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Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Kissing Colleagues

Dear Mistress Maeve,

A guy I've been out on a couple dates with wants to apply for a job at the company I work for, and I'm nervous about it. It's a great job, and he'd be a great candidate, but I like this guy, and I've always been taught that business and pleasure don't mix. It's not like I work for a large corporation with different departments — we'd be working in cubicles within earshot of one another.

I love my job and don't want anything to get in the way of my success. Should I discourage him from applying, even though I know he won't find another opportunity like this in our current economy? If he gets the job, do we have to stop seeing one another?

Company Woman


Dear C.W.,

You're right to be wary. But did you know that a staggering 40 percent of Americans find partners in the cubicle maze, according to With all the time we spend at the office, it's no surprise so many of us end up dating coworkers.

If you like this guy and feel he's a good candidate for the position, don't discourage him from applying — you'll only be doing him and the company a disservice. Besides, if he applies anyway and doesn’t get hired, you’ll have caused a rift for no reason.

Encourage him to apply and be supportive. If he gets the job, have an honest talk with him about your worries. To continue seeing each other, you’ll need to draw some strict boundaries. For instance, absolutely no public displays of affection at the office (or in the parking lot during lunch). And you should limit the number of people in the office who know about your relationship — at least until you decide you're seriously committed.

Don't forget to have a look at your company handbook. While most companies now tolerate intraoffice romances, you don't want his "stimulus package" to leave you both unemployed.

Workin' it,

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