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Seven Days Blogs: Mistress Maeve

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

All In For Anal

Dear Mistress Maeve,

I'm writing on behalf of me and my partner, as we need some assistance in the "back door" area, if you will.

I am a 34-year-old female without much anal sex experience. He is a 37-year-old male whose ex-girlfriend could apparently fit the Goodyear Blimp into her anus without so much as a drop of lube. I, on the other hand, am having a very hard time getting his penis into my ass and keeping it there. It just plain hurts! I've tried to "just relax," but that doesn't work. We get it pretty much all the way in, but it's more painful than pleasurable, so I ask him to take it out. Mistress, I want to have anal sex! What can we do to make it work?


From Pain to Pleasure?


Dear Pleasure,

I like a girl with good anal will and determination! Just remember, you're not a failure as a partner if anal isn't your thing, so be sure you're engaging only in sex acts that make you both feel good.

That said, if you're bent on taking it like a champ, I can offer these points of anal insight:

Lube: When engaging in any kind of anal penetration, always use lube to avoid injury. If you think you're using enough lube, add more for good measure — you can never have enough.

Preparing the way: The anus can be a very shy creature, puckering up if spooked. Don't go from having nothing in your ass to having the full girth of your guy's member. Foreplay with his fingers or a small toy will train your inner sphincter to relax.

Position: Positioning is key to relaxing enough to receive anal. Forget doggie-style or you being on top (way too tense); try lying in a spooning position with him entering you from the side. Or let him enter you from the good ol' missionary position where you can lie back and relax.

Gaining entry: When the time comes for insertion, take it slow. Don't allow him to enter you, pull all the way out and then enter you again (ouch!). Instead, allow him to enter you about an inch, then ask him to apply gentle pressure while you slide back onto him. Once he's in, remind him to be gentle — no slamming the back door (at least not until you're feeling more pleasure than pain).

Lubed and ready,


Friday, July 23, 2010

A True Boner

Bone Jezebel is reporting that archaeologists in Sweden have unearthed a penis-like object carved out of antler bone. Some archaeologists say the object may have been used to "chip flakes of flint." Please. We all know what that was used for, and it had nothing to do with starting a campfire.

From Jezebel via Live Science.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Kick Him To The Curb

Dear Mistress Maeve,

I have been seeing my “friend with benefits” for two years, and I've been desperately in love with him the entire time. Last summer we started getting really close and going out together. I was thrilled, but the dating was short lived. I knew he must be seeing someone else, but it was impossible for me to ignore his midnight booty calls.

I left town for a few months and thought I would get over him, but he sent texts saying how much he missed me and that he was obsessing over me. We sent a lot of dirty texts, and he requested nude pics, which I happily sent. When I came back home a few months ago, he was all of a sudden seeing someone, but he wanted to get together secretly. After some research on Facebook, I figured out that their relationship has been going on since last summer. From the posts on Facebook, they seem to be "in love," but I feel like saying, "If he loves you, why is he sleeping with me?" I know my relationship with him is unhealthy, but I feel like, no matter how much pain he causes me, I will still see him. How do I say no to him when I don't want to?

Can’t Fall Out


Dear C.F.O.,

Let's get right to the point: Your dude is a douche bag, and he will continue to act accordingly until you end this ridiculous charade of a relationship.

As difficult as it may be to admit, the problem here lies more with you than with him. You know he's a liar, a cheat and a sneak, and yet you can't kick him to the curb. It's time for you to take a serious look inside and figure out why you would allow anyone to use and disrespect you so badly for so long. Before you can say no to him, you'll have to say yes to yourself. Talk to a trusted friend or family member for support. If you suspect your inner journey will be a bumpy road, try seeing a counselor or therapist — believe me, you're worth it.

Unfortunately for this guy (and his so-called girlfriend), he'll probably always be a douche bag. Fortunately for you, with some newfound self-worth, you won't always be a door mat.

Showing him the door,

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Wishing Fountain

Dear Mistress Maeve,

My ex-girlfriend would orgasm multiple times per session. Her orgasms would often result in a dramatically abundant "gush" of female ejaculate, and I really liked it. It was not just a little bit of liquid, but rather was a massive burst of nectar that had the essence of citrus with a hint of bitterness and new-mown hay smell. It was wonderful.

Though I have not yet returned to the dating scene, I plan to in the near future. While I realize that there's more to a relationship than checking off some sort of "sexual shopping list," I really want to find a woman who can squirt. It seems like it would be extremely gauche to ask a woman, "Hey, can you gush?" So, Mistress, how do you suggest I find another fountain-like woman to appreciate?


Fountain Head


Dear Fountain,

Kudos to you for relishing your ex-girlfriend's squirting talents. Sadly, women who can ejaculate are sometimes embarrassed by it, either because of the "mess" or because they mistake their ejaculate for urine. The liquid that can be released during orgasm does come from the urethra, but it isn't urine — it’s a clear substance generated by the Skene’s glands (or G-spot). When aroused, the G-spot becomes engorged with fluid, which it releases into the urethra. Upon orgasm, this liquid can erupt — sometimes a little, sometimes a lot, depending on the woman. Some studies say that the majority of women ejaculate from the urethra during sex, but in small, undetectable quantities.

You're right — asking a woman whether she can gush is probably not the best pick-up line, nor should a woman's ability to ejaculate make or break your decision to be in a relationship with her. Rather than focusing on this one sexual act, focus on finding a mate who is as open about sex as you seem to be. For most women, it's anatomically possible to ejaculate, but it could take some practice. If you find a partner who's open to trying it, pick up a copy of Female Ejaculation and the G-Spot by Deborah Sundahl. The book discusses how to find the G-spot and how to ejaculate alone or with a partner.

Oh, and one last thing — if you do find a woman who can satisfy your thirst for squirt, you may want to keep the "new-mown hay smell" comment to yourself. I don't know many women who want to smell like a farm.

Gushingly yours,

Wednesday, July 07, 2010

Playing for the Other Team

Dear Mistress Maeve,

I just graduated and will be going to college on an athletic scholarship in the fall. I'm freaking out about meeting the other guys because I'm gay. In my sport, you're expected to be close with your teammates, and I just don't know how to handle it. Most people in my high school knew I was gay, but it really wasn't a huge deal, and we just didn't really talk about it. Without this scholarship, I would not be able to afford school, so I can't lose it. My parents are pressuring me a little to keep the gay thing under wraps for a while (even though they're mostly supportive). I know I’m lucky to be going to school in a liberal place like Vermont, but these guys will be coming from all over the country. What do you think?




Dear Co-Captain,

No one should have to hide who they are, and you have every right to be yourself without fear of losing your scholarship. If anyone on the team is uncomfortable with your sexuality, it's their problem, not yours.

Attending college in Vermont, you'll be enjoying a highly supportive atmosphere where prejudice is generally not tolerated. That said, being part of a sports team is not unlike being part of a family, and we all know how complicated those relationships can be. Add locker-room culture to that mix, and it's understandable that you feel apprehensive about coming out.

As a rule, it's best to get to know people before disclosing too much intimate information, including sexual orientation. Spend some time with your teammates, seek out those with whom you feel most comfortable and start the coming-out process with them. Meanwhile, get involved with your school's LGBTQA group (that's Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning and Allies). You'll meet new friends and gain a network of support.

Team spirit,

Friday, July 02, 2010

For the Love of Lelo

Lelo-nea2 Lelo is one of my favorite sex toy companies — they're innovative, aesthetically pleasing and, of course, fulfilling. My first foray into Lelo's line of toys was the Nea Vibe. It's a sweet, unassuming clitoral vibrator with multiple settings. The best part is that it's cordless and rechargeable — it comes with a plug for juicing it up, just like your cell phone. Plug it when you're done with it, and it will recharge for another 90 minute's worth of vibrating fun. My only gripe about the Nea Vibe is the hard plastic it's made out of — not as sexy as some other toys made out of softer, skin-like materials. For a quick romp, the Nea Vibe is great, but for longer sessions, I prefer something with a softer shell, like the Laya Spot that is made of hard plastic and Elastomer.

Leo-sutra And just when I thought Lelo was all about hi-tech, they go and release some low-fi cuffs — and I want a pair! I am very, very picky about restraints. I cannot stand cuffs that are made from cheap materials that scratch and dig into skin — not sexy. Lelo's Sutra Cuffs look like just the opposite of chintzy. Made of suede and silk, these cuffs appear to be some of the most luxurious on the market. Looking forward to getting my hands on some... err, in some.

I might just celebrate my independence with a little bondage. Bableland is offering free shipping on all items, including Lelo Sutra Cuffs, through July 5.

Happy Holiday Weekend,

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Bummed Out

Dear Mistress Maeve,

Just finished up my junior year of college and will be returning next semester, living with the same group of guys I roomed with this year. I’ve been chill with these guys since first-year orientation, and I thought I knew everything about them. However, a situation just occurred that I can’t get forget about.

On the last day of our lease, one of my housemates apparently thought we had all moved out, but I still had one load of stuff to take out. When I went back, I found him beating off in the living room. He thought he would be alone, so no big deal — but I know that I saw something in his butt. Is this a normal thing for men to do? Does this mean he’s gay? Because I don’t know any straight guys who let anything near their asses. I don't want it to be weird next semester.

Exit Only


Dear Exit Only,

Would you feel weird about being his roommate because you caught him masturbating, or because you think he’s gay? Either way, it’s time for you to grow up and see this situation for what it is: no big deal.

Sure, whacking off in a common area of the house is a no-no — but, like you said, he thought everyone had moved out. As far as the “something” in his butt is concerned, it doesn’t make him gay. In fact, the only thing it makes him is more sexually enlightened than you. The anus has thousands of sensitive nerve endings, plus it gives you access to your prostate. Many men, gay and straight alike, derive immense pleasure from anal stimulation with a tongue, finger or toy.

Walking in on your roommate getting busy with himself must have been a shock, but by the time next semester rolls around, it will most likely be a distant memory. If it turns out your roomie is gay, you shouldn’t allow it to have any bearing on your friendship — he’s still the same guy you’ve known for years.
Use this awkward experience to further your own sexual exploration. Before you go knocking anal pleasure, you might want to try it. Who knows, you might change your “Exit Only” sign to read “Entrance in Rear.”

Bum’s rush,

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

It Bears Repeating

As some of you may recall, I've long lusted after gay bears — you know, gay men of the big, brawny and hairy variety. Unfortunately for me, I am not a gay male, so I've had a relatively low success rate getting burly homos to bed me. Thus, I've had to go after straight men of the same ilk (think Zach Galifianakis, Seth Rogan, Jerry Ferrara and Kevin Gillespie from season six of Top Chef).

Being that most of my friends are gay, we've never referred to my type as "teddy bear" like some mainstream media (check out this slideshow of "Hot Teddy Bears" at We've always referred to my type as "straight bear," because that's precisely what I want. So, imagine my delight when I stumbled upon this article from the Village Voice entitled Move Over, Metrosexuals: Meet the Straight Bears.


The article discusses how straight bears are embracing the gay community, in particular celebrities such as Kevin Smith who was scheduled to attend the 16th annual International Bear Rendezvous in San Francisco before Southwest Airlines booted him off the plane for being too fat — err, I mean "bear-like."

If nothing else, click over to the Village Voice to see the illustration by Edwin Huang. Can I get that life-size to hang over my bed? Better yet, can I get that bear-size?


Thursday, June 24, 2010

Surprise (Third) Party

Dear Mistress Maeve,

Thirty-two-year-old gay male here, and I’ve been with my partner for a little over five years. We’ve occasionally opened our bedroom to third (and sometimes more) parties for extracurricular fun together. I would be happy to have sex with other people on a more regular basis, but my partner has been somewhat resistant to it at times over the years. However, sometimes he’s really into it. Lately, he’s been hinting around about finding a guy on the Internet to screw, so — unbeknownst to him — I went online and scouted out a good candidate. My question is, do you think it’s a good idea to surprise my partner with a hot guy in our apartment when he gets off work one night? He’s been so stressed out lately that I think it could be a welcomed surprise, but something is making me hesitate. In the past, we’ve always talked about it and decided on a guy together.

Third-Party Planner


Dear Planner,

Trust your gut. If something about this idea is giving you pause, best to heed the warning. You say your partner has been resistant to opening your relationship in the past. For that reason alone, you must be certain to give your partner every consideration before planning a three-way.

While sexual surprises sound good in theory, any little thing could throw off your plans. What if you’re misreading your partner’s “hints”? What if he would rather sit on the couch, eat a pint of ice cream and cuddle on the night you plan the big rendezvous? At the very least, ask your partner if he’d be interested in coming home to find a naked dude in your bed. If he gives you the green light, go ahead and plan your date — you can still use elements of surprise.

If you’re interested in increasing the intimacy in your relationship through these “extracurricular activities,” I highly suggest picking partners together. Not only will you be on the same page about date, time and other logistics, but you’ll have a chance to anticipate the encounter together — an intensely erotic and bonding experience.

You have the best of intentions, and it’s admirable that you’re trying to meet your partner’s needs; however, wouldn’t it be far better to communicate with him first so your efforts will be 100 percent effective?

Three’s company,

Friday, June 18, 2010

Have Vagina, Will Travel

What is it about doing an interview with Playboy that will make even the most famous of Hollywood actresses open up and say the word "cock?"

In the July 2010 edition of Playboy, Cameron Diaz dishes about Justin Timberlake, denies a relationship with A-Rod and explains that sometimes a girl needs to get on a plane for a proper rogering:

"Oh gosh, I can't even count how many times I've gotten on a plane for love. It's not unusual in this business; my lifestyle demands it. I'm always traveling for [whispers] cock. You've got to go where it is."


Regarding the type of lover she is, Diaz says:

"I'm primal on an animalistic level, kind of like, 'Bonk me over the head, throw me over your shoulder. You man, me woman.' Not everybody has the right kind of primal thing for me...I love physical contact. I have to be touching my lover, like, always. It's not optional."

Hmm. Maybe Cammy and I have more in common than I think...

You can read the rest of the article at (probably not safe for work viewing, even if you're just looking at it for the articles).

Happy Friday,

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

A Bridge, Erected

Jalopnik is reporting that a Russian drawbridge has been defaced with a drawing of a giant penis. Now, as  motorist sit and wait, they can enjoy a much more entertaining "erection" of the bridge.

500x_bridge_penis The best part of this blog post? The comments, of course. All of these come from the same contributor:

"Now that's a cock that sees a lot of traffic."

"Someone should probably lay a rubber on that thing."

"That's one way of insuring that any cars crossing the bridge get fucked while in traffic."

"You can count on this bridge to up at around 5:45am every morning."

Nice. My contribution? "If the bridge gets stuck like that for longer than four hours, does it need to consult its doctor immediately?"

(Thanks to my pal at The Dead Pool for sending this one my way.)


Porn Panic

Dear Mistress Maeve,

I've been with my boyfriend for almost a year. He's 28, and I'm 20. Age aside, we have an amazing relationship and out-of-this-world sex! I was not snooping, but I was searching through the web history on the computer, and I came across some websites my boyfriend had visited. I am well aware that he watches porn every now and again, and I'm OK with it, but these were teen porn websites! The thought of it makes my stomach turn. Given our age difference, do you think it's creepy that he's watching this type of porn when he's nearly 30? Should I say something to him, or will he think I was snooping when I was absolutely not?!

Please help! I'm worried that when we have sex, I'll only be able to think about how he likes ’em young. I now feel the long-term potential for our relationship is gone...



Dear Anonymous,

For the sake of this conversation, let's assume you're referring to the "barely legal" variety of pornography featuring young-looking performers of legal age. (If you mean actual child pornography, report him to the police immediately.)

For better or worse, "barely legal" porn is among the most popular in our society. Our culture teaches men to lust over the virginal teenager, flush with budding sexuality — this goes for straight and gay men alike. So it's really not shocking that you found this popular porn genre on your boyfriend's computer. Furthermore, it's important to remember that most of us will never fulfill the fantasies we live out while watching porn — if we did, we'd all be doing gang bangs in Elizabethan costumes (or maybe that's just me).

Still, it's perfectly understandable that you have some concerns. It's time to have a chat with your boyfriend. Admit to looking through his computer's history. (He's going to think you were snooping, so just apologize and be done with it.) Let him know that you support his right to look at porn, but you'd like to be able to discuss the types of images he's interested in. Tell him that, given your age difference and his taste for teens, you want to be sure he views you as an equal partner in your relationship and not as a fetish object. If your relationship is strong and healthy, this conversation will only deepen your connection.

In all likelihood, your boyfriend is simply one of the millions of guys who get off to “barely legal” porn. But don't miss this opportunity to talk with your man and perhaps bring your relationship to a new level of honesty and intimacy.

Playing the ingenue,

Monday, June 14, 2010

Weapons of (M)Ass Destruction?

Recently, a good friend of mine flew out of New York's LaGuardia airport for some fun in the sun in Florida. Hoping that she'd get lucky, she packed two gigantic dildos and her harness. (The power of positive thinking, right?)

Upon arriving in Florida and unzipping her suitcase, my friend realized that representatives from the Transportation Security Administration had gone through her luggage. Most of us who fly with any regularity have experienced this — you open your suitcase to find that TSA has "gently" gone through your personal items to ensure you're not traveling with a bomb or other weaponry. How do we know the TSA has done this? They lay a "Notification Form" neatly on top of your things.

Tsa Well, in my friend's case, not only did the TSA representative(s) leave one notification, they left two — wrapped tightly around each giant dong, like two cock burritos going for plane ride. Sadly, you can't really see TSA's handy work in this picture, but I'm sure you can use your imagination.

Under the "What We Do" tab on TSA's website, it says, "Together with local airports, we constantly field new equipment and protocols to ensure the latest available technology is used to both screen checked baggage and to maximize efficiency."

Right. Because taking the time to wrap two dildos in TSA paperwork is a shining example of maximized efficiency.

Whatever. I guess we all get bored at work...

Have any funny and/or infuriating travel stories? Feel free to share in comments.


Thursday, June 10, 2010

The Ex Factor

Dear Mistress Maeve,

Is there any acceptable way to ask one of my ex-wife’s friends out on a date, or is it just not OK? My wife and I separated and divorced about three years ago. The split was amicable, and her idea, if that matters. Although I have dated since, I have not found anyone as compelling as this friend. She and my ex are not close, but I have not called her because I didn’t think it was appropriate. I am asking for some help in understanding the female perspective on this situation, and what is the most respectful way to approach the conversation? She is a beautiful, intelligent person with a great sense of humor — should I make the call?

The Ex Factor


Dear Ex Factor,

If people in Vermont refused to ask out potential mates because of social crossover, we'd all be in forced celibacy. If you feel as strongly about this woman as you claim, you must make a move — otherwise, you'll be left with a lingering "What if...?"

You say your divorce was amicable. Have you considered giving your ex-wife a heads-up on your attraction to her acquaintance? While you certainly do not need your ex's permission to pursue your love interest (especially because the split was her idea), a courtesy forewarning could go a long way toward keeping the peace. Plus, if your new lady is apprehensive about what your ex may think, you can assure her you've already addressed the issue.

You mention calling your love interest, which is admirable in this technological age (wooing a mate over the phone is a lost art form). However, given the potential for discomfort, you might be better served by tracking down her email address. Express yourself in writing, letting her know you're aware of the sticky social situation you're putting her in. Also tell her how compelling you find her and that you could not let it go until you asked her out. At the very least, you'll be paying her a huge compliment — ex factor or not.

Exes and Ohs,

Wednesday, June 02, 2010

All Ears

Dear Mistress Maeve,

I’m a 29-year-old woman, and I’m writing to you in hopes that you can make me feel better about a pattern that’s emerging with my boyfriend.

I’m not going to lie to you and tell you that I’m “experienced” and “open minded” when it comes to sex. The truth is, unlike other readers who write to you, I’m more traditional and like sex to be romantic and emotionally intimate. For the most part, my boyfriend shares my same values, although he is a bit more adventurous and likes to try new positions and activities.

Recently, he’s been emphatic that I kiss his earlobes when he’s close to orgasming. I can understand that kissing his earlobes must feel good, but he’s bordering on becoming insistent that my mouth be on his ear when he ejaculates. Is this weird? Would you classify this as a fetish?



Dear Earmarked,

Technically, a person fetishizes an object, not an action — so, no, your boyfriend’s interest in receiving ear stimulation is not classifiable as a fetish.

It’s not difficult to understand your beau’s ache for ear attention. At the very least, ears are closely tied to sexual arousal. When we’re turned on, our ears get hot and, on some of us, turn bright red — dead giveaway of arousal. Ears are also full of nerve endings, making them an intense erogenous zone for most of us. In all likelihood, your boyfriend experiences a heightened sexual arousal and release when your mouth is by his ear, kissing, moaning and breathing.

There’s nothing “weird” about giving pleasure to your partner, and one could easily argue that there’s nothing more “romantic” than listening to your partner’s needs and delivering. Think about it: He’s asking you to be close to him while he orgasms, stimulating him with touch, sound and scent — can you imagine anything more intimate?

Giving you an earful,

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Handle It

Dear Mistress Maeve,

I'm sure you get this one a lot, but what is a good way to stop the habit of masturbation? I have been told that it does no harm to the body and that it's fine to be doing it as much as I want. However, I would still like to stop for reasons of my own. Do you have any tricks to break the habit? I'm not religious, so no luck there, and I've tried all sorts of other ways. Could I get a little help here?

Beat It


Dear Beat It,

Actually, I don’t get this question a lot — and, frankly, I’m struggling to grasp why you’d want to deprive yourself of one of life’s greatest joys. As long as you’re not missing work or other obligations to jerk off, and as long as you’re not consistently choosing masturbation over having sex with a partner, there’s no reason to quit. In fact, getting off is a proven stress reliever for both men and women, and some studies point to masturbation as a means of keeping men’s prostates healthy.

So what’s with the angst? Are you afraid of getting caught? Did something awful happen to you in childhood that now makes whacking off emotionally destructive? If you have some deep-rooted issues about masturbation, I highly recommend seeing a therapist. Our bodies want to orgasm, and I’m afraid you’ll have a miserable existence if you live the rest of your days trying to avoid dates with Pamela Handerson.

Handling It,

Thursday, May 20, 2010


Dear Mistress Maeve,

I grew up fat. Very, very fat. I didn’t date very much. When I did "date," I slept with the guy right away and never heard from him again. Eventually, I found a cool guy who was fine with just having a sexual relationship, and we’ve been having sex for about 10 years.

Now, I’ve lost all the weight and gained some self-esteem. I still see my sex buddy three to four times a month. The sex is AWESOME, but that’s all it is — sex.  We don't talk on the phone, hang out or run in the same group of friends. I date, but I have yet to meet anyone I’d leave my sex buddy for — so I end up sleeping with both my “dates” and my sex buddy (carefully, of course).

My problem now is that I am dating a very nice guy, and I like him. I want a boyfriend, and I think I could have something awesome with this guy. However, I don't know how (nor do I really want) to lose my sex buddy. I'm afraid to lose what I have — great sex and a special friend — for a chance at a real boyfriend.



Dear Weight-ing,

You struck up a convenient relationship with your sex buddy when your self-esteem was at an all-time low. It sounds like you weren’t able to accept love when you were heavier, and your sex buddy offered you a way to be sexually satisfied without being emotionally vulnerable.

Now that you’ve lost the weight, it’s time to clean house. Just as you go through your closet and get rid of the clothes that are now too big, you must also toss out the habits and relationships that no longer fit.

You are hanging on to your sex buddy because you’re afraid to let go and accept that you are good enough to love and be loved. If you truly want a boyfriend, it’s time to say goodbye to a 10-year relationship that is holding you back. You’re physically skinny — now it’s time to slim down emotionally.

Big love,

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

V Is For Vibrator

V-isfor One of the creative (and depraved) folks in the Seven Days design department sent me a link to "Effing Typeface," a font created by Alex Merto. Needless to say, it's my new favorite font, and I will use it to write everything from emails to business letters.

Here's the link to view the font. The site is safe for work viewing, but some of the lettering gets a little unsavory.

Monday, May 17, 2010

Q&A with MM

Ever wonder what it's like being a sex columnist? Peek behind the curtain by reading my Q&A with the folks from Planned Parenthood of Northern New England's blog called Consensual Text.

Consensual Text is PPNNE's naughty and irreverent look at sex and relationships in mainstream culture. Everything from banned ads, to info on the speed of sperm, book reviews and, of course, good information about staying safe.

Pretty cool.


Friday, May 14, 2010

Lurid Digs

Luriddigs A warning before we begin: Some of these links are absolutely NOT okay for work viewing (even on Casual Friday).

My gay friends were all a-twitter this week with Lurid Digs -- a blog-style site dedicated to "horrifying gay amateur interiors." By trolling the Internet to find gay men shooting amateur porn in horrifyingly decorated (or just plain nasty) rooms, Lurid Diggs strives to smash the myth that all gay men are naturally-talented interior designers. In fact, the creators of Lurid Digs say, "These Feng Shui-challenged souls have proven over and over again that male homosexuals can be just as color uncoordinated, sloppy and nastee as their straight brethren . . . the gap between what defines gay and straight is slowly beginning to zipper shut."

The site features hilarious commentary about photos of gay men getting it on in rooms that look like your grandparents house and a college fraternity house had a lovechild and named it "Tasteless." The commentators are well-known in cyber circles -- Heather Corinna, Publisher of Scarleteen, and Sean Horlor, Vancouver gay blogger from, to name a couple.

Again, don't check out Lurid Digs at work, but you MUST check it out. I never knew lava lamps were making such a comeback in the gay community...

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